Thursday, August 10, 2006

In the blogging world...

I have been reading posts today and everyone is talking about this "guilt" idea of adopting children from different countries. This is a comment that I posted on Kay's blog but when I read it back to Shawn, he suggested I post it here as well so...

"I don't feel any guilt about adopting internationally. I can see where you (K was writing about feeling as though she was injuring the global community by taking that child out of her homeland) are coming from with your thoughts on the injury to the global community however, I think that our world is one where immigration happens every minute. We are able to move from one country and culture to another in a matter of hours. As well, reading different stories and knowing women from China, I don't think that international adoption causes female infanticide and abandonment. I do think however that international adoption allows these children to live in a culture where they are celebrated for who they are whether they have special needs or are female. I read one post where an infertile Chinese women felt so guilty that she was willing to give her husband a divorce (she had shamed both of their families by not being able to give birth to a child)!!
When we adopt our daughter from an orphanage where she is one of many and give her a family, where she is the one and only child - her life will change for the better, we think. We live in a city where many of the original settlers were Asian and there is a huge Asian community here - it grows daily through immigration and our daughter will be part of this. If everyone stays in their country of birth, how can they share their culture and promote multiculturalism and understanding in the world. At my workplace and in my family I will be the minority but that intrigues me - we have multicultural potlucks at work which I organize and I adore learning about my husband's culture. So no guilt here at all. Can't wait to raise my daughter and give her everything I was given as a child - including a keen sense of HERself and her culture.

So, that's what I think. I have always liked to call Canada a "salad bowl" where people are invited to share and maintain their culture when they immigrate to this country. I am a proud 4th generation Canadian but my ancestors too came from somewhere else and we were able to keep many of our customs and ideas. So, again, can't wait to raise my daughter and celebrate her ancestry with her!!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm in total agreement. I mean, if a Chinese couple who have emigrated to the US or Canada go back and adopt a child from China....and then raise her 100% Western (because they want to assimilate into their new, permanent home), then is that "stealing her culture" from her.

too much self-induced guilt.

C's Mom said...

Very well said!

After all, a good salad is wonderful and healthy too...both literally and figuratively.

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad you're adding your voice to this discussion. I think you have a unique perspective in that (if I remember correctly!) you already live in a multicultural home, and are already aware of the work -- and the joy -- involved in incorporating different traditions into your family experience. It's clear that you already know that Isabel's arrival will only make that experience richer.

Thanks again for commenting over at my place and for continuing to talk about this!

Kristine said...

Yep, we are a "multi-cultural" family and can't wait to integrate Isabel's culture into ours. Off to the Dragon Boat races...